When it comes to Self Love many of us believe we already do. Our actions and words say otherwise.
In my journey to find love I have been often told that I can not find love until I learned to love myself. Like others when I would hear this I would think I already do! If I didnt I would of stayed in realtionships that were painful and disfunctional. Yet I keep finding myself in relationships that are just that! They were not always as bad as the last but never less just as painful and disappointing. I felt I was a strong, independent women who had fought all odds to not only stay alive but raise a happy healthy young man through it all, so there had to be self love somewhere in there? Right?
I am finding its not as simple as that and of course my actions and the fact that I am not enjoying a healthy loving relationship is making it quite obvious that my self love needs some rehab. I now understand that loving myself is essential to not only my personal growth but also to the fulfillment of my dreams and to developing healthy, happy relationships with others and instead of just trying to talk myself into believeing that I have self love. I need to have self-love and learn to foster compassion for myself and do it without thinking I am being selfish or that my needs are not as important as everyone else.
I have decided to dedicate the month of October to be a Love Rehab month. I plan on experimenting over the next 30 days in the area of
Self-Love!! Not Ego Love but True Self Love, the kind that develops only from self acceptance and validation.
I figured I better start out with three simple but important guidlines.
1. It is not selfish to care about yourself!!
If some of us put half the effort we put into other into ourselves our lives would do a 360 turn around.
So this month I will make sure I am treating myself no differnt than anyone else. My needs and desires are important as well and they need to be met like everyone else!!
2. Maintain my boundries!!
This is the only way I will be able to do #1. Dr. Phil had a line that I liked "You teach people how to treat you" and I have done that most of my life but like others I have not done it in a authentic way. I have allowed my need to be validated and accepted to get in the way of setting healthy and loving boundries for myself and others. Its time I retaught myself and others around me what is now acceptable and what is not.
3. Do what I need to do to be me and have my needs met!!
This too will be tough. When you have most of your life thought of others before yourself its not a easy task to now look at your wants and your needs. I am sure over the next month I will start to see where my giving myself away has limited my abilty to not only have my needs met but be able to express them with healthy boundries and have a true idea of what self love is..
I am not sure where I will be at the end of the month but I have a feeling it will be a great way to celebrate my life as well as ignite my passion in ways I never belived possiable.
When I think about what the world would be like if we all practiced self love for ourselves along with compassion and acceptance for others I kind of feel like Neil Armstrong. 'That's one small step for Man, One giant leap for Mankind"
Like aways you are welcome to come along for the journey, I am sure we can all use a little Self-Love Rehab in our lives.....
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