Monday, September 2, 2013
Waking up to the fact I am only Human........
Doing research this morning on my new eating regime for the next 3 weeks and beyond. Like my life wasn't complicated enough!! So far all I know is that I should of listened to my body six years ago when it started to rebel!!!! Maybe I wouldn't of spent 7 days in the hospital fighting to keep a section of my colon and from wearing a colostomy bag for 6-8 month, hell the rest of my life? All along being treated with high does of antibiotic to fight off an infection while trying to keep my Virus from raring it's ugly head. NO F**king Fun believe me. If just the thought of that wasn't emotionally bad enough after Austin not quite having the summer he expected coming home to find me hooked up to machines and IV's and once again sporting a two piece Johnny was not the home coming I had planned or that he needed to let him know everything is going to be ok. Lucky I was in a beautiful hospital that treated the whole me and showed me respect the kind you would want when facing life on life's terms while feeling your most vulnerable. The hospital and it's staff went out of their way for me and Austin to have the best home coming we could of in that situation, Austin came home to one big family that was looking after one another. The kindness going from the housekeeping staff, kitchen and nurses and lets not forget those volunteers and all my friends who came to visit and sent cards you all gave me time to reflect on my life, my family and that maybe I do only have one life. and as Judas Priest said "I am going to life it up!!" The universe said we have many lives but whose to say we get many chance after were died. The mind can be a beautiful friend or a cunning trickster, it's up to us who we choose to listen too. I know am listening to my beautiful friend, my body who is telling me its time for a change a true rebirth from the cellular point of view. Even though my time at the hospital was one of many lessons I wont ever allow myself to be there again without knowing I did everything I could to not allow it to. 7 days was enough for me to see I am only human but my spirit rides with the faith and hope of the Angels and with thoughts like that I can move mountains. Who would of thought with all my brushes with death the one thing that opened my eyes was the one that made me see "I am not afraid to die as much as I am afraid to live a painful life."
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