What is wrong with being a Rhino anyways?

It has taken me years to learn that being lazy is okay.

In a society that requires consent motion to equal success this has been a hard lesson to learn.

Many years ago I thought that if I tackled my procrastination problem I would be on the road to success but soon found that in my world that would not be the case. You see I bought goal setting books. I even took online courses and made charts of what to do. I even decided to teach a class thinking this way I would be disciplined and make a habit of it myself. Come to find out I had to cancel the class due to my procrastination.   

Come to find out after years of studying my blood type, how health and wellness comes in many forms and just recently my find of Human Design. I am suppose to be somewhat lazy!

Yay, for me...   

The reason none of that worked for me is because that is not who I am or how I best work in the world. Those who know me can tell you I never lack the drive to get something done, it's just I might wait until I have to or want to. I have also found that when the request comes in a form of "have to" and not my choice I instinctively rebel. Who would of guessed.  

I have often wondered why everyone else seems to have to go, go, go attitude while I usually am more like wait, why and really? That my weekends sometime consist of trips only to the refrigerator, bathroom and bed while others seem to build cities, take trips around the world, while cleaning their houses and making trips to the store. Some weekends my biggest outing is going to the store. No kidding it really is.   I must say that I do have my moments but they are all done in one day, playing taxi, shopping, seeing friends and even writing can all take place in one day and then the next I have to rest up from a full day of being total human.  This use to make me very depressed and over the years as I learned more about my hidden allergies, my illness and how rest seemed to suppress the virus and help my body to heal I lessened up on my self and came to terms with this is who I have become. I never realized this was also who I am suppose to be. Just like you can not judge a fish by his ability to climb a tree. You can not judge a person by what or what they do not do. 

I have recently accepted that to go against the flow of who I am is really stopping my opportunity to move forward.  Making plans to do Yoga in the morning never has worked for me yet every chart had me doing it in the Morning. I write better in the morning when my mind is the clearest.

I love to walk in Nature but when I plan something it never fails that when that day comes around I am just not in the mood. So walking when I feel like it is better then making it a planned activity. I could go on about how I have been silently sabotaging myself by trying to fit into other peoples or societies mold of who they think I should be or want me to be but also comparing myself to others without every allowing myself to find what works best for me. I find this effects many people as I struggle to understand it within myself. I am learning that how I live in the world is dependent on many things, some seen and some unseen and as I have been saying lately. A rhino can think like a unicorn, act like a unicorn, even pretend to be a unicorn but the truth is, it's a rhino always has been and always will be. When the day comes that rhino realizes that will the day that rhino will be truly free.